Attention seekers....

With less than 5 weeks to go before I start my Ambulance Tech course I have been looking back at many of the cases I have treated over the years.

The most common "incident" that I came across was the attention seeking patient who had nothing medical wrong with them but more often than not having just had a row with their friends. Two incidents that stand out from over the years both happened at nightclubs and one involved a female patient and the other a male patient.

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The first incident involved the male and occurred after the club was finished for the night and most of the crowds dispersed. There was two of us on that night and we were talking with the doormen inside the club before heading home when someone ran in the door screaming that there was a collapse outside. The two of us went outside followed by some of the door staff to ensure our safety to find a young male lying down on the ground.

The initial assessment is carried out by the other medic on with me who determined that they were breathing just unresponsive. I told him to put him into the recovery position upon which he grips the patient by the shoulder and hip and pulls him over, it was at this stage that i noticed his right leg lifting up neatly and being brought over so that id didnt bang onto the ground with no support by anything underneath!. On closer inspection his eyelids were fluttering in an attempt to keep them closed and his "fits" that he was now having did not involve his head hitting the ground! I attempted to get a response from him, pointing out to him that I knew he was faking, but he did not respond at all.

A Dublin Fire Brigade Ambulance arrived shortly afterwards and the first thing they said was "He's faking isn't he". They then took him off our hands having not been able to get him to respond to them either.

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The second incident involved a female who was part of a private party in the bar next to the club who "collapsed" beside the nightclub. I was called out to have a look at her as she was fitting. The first thing I noticed about her "fit" was that like the male patient above her head was stopping short of hitting the ground. I got her friends to stay quiet and I spoke quietly to her say that I knew she was faking and to stop and sit up. She did stop fitting but as soon as her friends started calling out that she was fine and was going to be ok etc she started "fitting" again. At this point her skirt was rising up her thighs and I could see her underwear and said to her "You might want to stop doing that now love as I can see your knickers", these words had the desired effect and she stopped straight away.

After two more episodes of this thankfully a Dublin Fire Brigade Ambulance arrived and she then had another "fit", I gave my handover to the arriving Paramedics and demonstrated my miraculous fit stopping skills by reminding the girl I could see her knickers again!. They too couldnt get her to see sense and took her to hospital.

Please note I would have covered her if I had spare blankets or a coat which i didnt have at the time!

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These are only two of many similar incidents I have come across over many years of treating people at events and elsewhere. What they all do not seem to care about or realise is that the resources of the Ambulance Services and the A&E departments are finite and have to be diverted to watching them because they are "unconscious" which in a genuine case is a life threatning condition.

For those that arent transported to hospital it is also a frustration to the medics treating them on the side of the street or at an event that their time is wasted dealing with this individual who is just out to get attention. Despite this frustration they are still treated with respect and to the same standard of another genuine patient.